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A SHAVE AND A SCARE CUT!
I am just making you kids a little FRIGHT TO EAT here. It's a little HACK BEFORE DINNER, while we listen to this evening's tale. I hope you all like bags of FREE-TOES hee-hee-hee-hee! They are tasty, but they're AS TOUGH AS TOENAILS aha-ha-ha-ha-ha! Anyways, I title this one... Back in 1877, a barber within a barbershop over in east-Germany shaved a man's beard. The barber whistled The Muffin-Man and as he took his razor, he held onto the man's shoulder, blew out the candles around them and slit his throat in the shadows. "Zere all finished, Mr. Gutenburg. I no longer have any competition vith you as barber in zis village!" the barber said to the dead man's corpse. A younger lady came into the barbershop that night. "Darling, Mr. Gutenburg is not in his own barbershop up ze street zis evening" she informed the barber. "Oh, hello Ida my Wife. I um, have not seen him today at all" he uttered to her, putting a pair of scissors away in a drawer. "Harold I have cooked a roast for our supper zis evening dear" Ida told him. "Zank you my love" Harold smiled nervously to her. Six years later, Harold rode in a horse-drawn stage-coach passed an abandoned building with a sign above the door that read, "GUTENBURG'S BARBERSHOPPE" on it in faded white paint. "Ah, Mr. Vindenheimer, good day to you sir" a gentleman on the brick-street spoke to Harold, as the barber halted his horse with a tug of the reins. "Good afternoon Villiam Schmidt how are you today sir?" Harold Vindenheimer asked the man. "Very vell zank you. Doing vell yourself I hope" William Schmidt uttered. "Doing fine zank you. I vas just on my vay to ze bakery!" Harold chimed. "Ah, I see. Vell, ze baker is moving to Mr. Gutenburg's old barbershoppe there for a larger bakery, Mr. Vindenheimer" William Schmidt explained to Harold. "Oh, really? Vell, good" Harold squeaked out, nervously. Harold was at his barbershop that evening, and was sweeping the floors. There were footsteps suddenly coming up stairs. Harold stopped sweeping, hearing them. He pressed his ear to a door. The footsteps came to the other side of the door and it burst-open just then, knocking Harold to the floor, as he yelled. A decayed-skeleton wearing a white barber outfit was there, moving into the room. The zombie's bones had a blue color to them, and Harold screamed in horror at the sight of it. "Mr. Harold Vindenheimer, it is I, Mr. Gutenburg!" the zombie moaned in a distorted-voice. As Harold got to his feet, the rottng-corpse of Mr. Gutenburg got a razor from on a drawer with his decaying-boney-fingers and as Harold got to the door, the zombie flung it directly into his back in within the shadows, murdering him. Then, the skeleton of Mr. Gutenburg laughed in his distorted voice. Well, Mr. Gutenburg's zombie got quite SNIPPY with Harold in the end. I couldn't blame him ever since Harold had given him that GRAVE AND A HAIR CUT eh? ha-ha-ha. But luckily Mr. Gutenburg got quite SHARP WITH HIM AND MADE THE FINAL CUT heh-heh!